Protesting NFL'ers Colin Kaepernick, Eric Reid and Jeremy Lane found themselves exiled to the far Northwest reaches of Alaska. Alone, cold and afraid, they realized the first thing they needed to do was come up with a survival plan.
Reed spoke up first and said, "If we run into any cops, we're in a lot of trouble. I'm packin with no permit."
Lane replied, "Forget the cops, we need to worry about what the Eskimos will do if they find us."
Kaepernick said, "Don't either of you fools realize we're in Kodiak bear territory. Gimme the damn gun."
All three died from exposure later that night as they argued over whether to call Domino's or Pizza Hut.
Reed spoke up first and said, "If we run into any cops, we're in a lot of trouble. I'm packin with no permit."
Lane replied, "Forget the cops, we need to worry about what the Eskimos will do if they find us."
Kaepernick said, "Don't either of you fools realize we're in Kodiak bear territory. Gimme the damn gun."
All three died from exposure later that night as they argued over whether to call Domino's or Pizza Hut.
